Lyin’ and cheatin’ aint no way to live.
And, I’m glad you had the sense enough to give
Us a chance to start over
Without you in my life.
We are better now, better than ever.
I don’t need you and I will never.
I’ve made it a year now.
I didn’t fall apart.
Found a new boy and gave him my heart.
He’ll never hurt me.
He’ll never leave.
He’s loved me right from the start.
That 4 year old boy sure loves his mommy.
And, he’ll always have my heart.
Written July 13, 2012
They drive me nuts.
They make me crazy.
They make me smile.
They’re sometimes lazy.
They make a mess.
Id expect nothing less.
They get hurt.
I try to heal them.
They get upset
And you can bet
They will say they hate me.
But, more often they say they love me.
They kiss and hug me.
They like to bug me.
They grow too fast.
But, our love will last.
They are my children.
I love and I adore them!
I am their mommy.
Written on July 13, 2012
Be careful of the words you choose,
For they may come back to haunt you.
When we spout off words of hate,
We tend to find out way too late,
How much they can hurt someone we love,
And, how it’s like a little shove,
Pushing them away from us,
And, making them fee so sad.
Is that how you want to treat a love that you have had?
Acting like you don’t care,
When deep down, you wish they were still there?
Still with you with those words not said?
Be careful of the words you choose.
Written July 15, 2012
You may hate me
When we disagree,
But, I will love you to eternity.
It hurts me when you say it.
It hurts me very much.
But, in the end you come back with hugs and kisses and such.
You say you didn’t mean it and you love me quite a lot.
So, please remember next time we disagree
How much you really love me and how you hate me not.
Written July 15, 2012
I don’t have to stick around “mean”
Just because “mean” likes to stick around me.
I don’t have to walk with “ugly”
Just because “ugly” wants to walk with me.
I will not hang with “jealousy”
Just because “jealousy” likes to keep tabs on me.
I choose to live my life with “Love”
Just because “Love” has chosen me.
Written on July 15, 2012
Some will choose to be ignorant even after they’ve been provided proof.
Blaming others for all their woes and continuing to act aloof.
Let not their ignorance affect you in a negative way.
Your life will continue to improve more and more each day.
Some people will choose to live in the past. Let that not worry you.
You know where your future lies and each morning is brand new.
Some people will try to hold you back so they won’t be alone.
Misery loves company, but you live in a misery free zone.
Let not their poor choices destroy what you’ve built.
You’ve come a long way, baby and should not carry any guilt!
Pinnochio
I noticed your limp today.
And couldn’t help but wonder.
If it’s all catching up with you.
Your nose does seem longer
And you’re always telling lies
So, could the tale be true?
If the tale were true
Wouldn’t that be a hoot?
The kids could finally spend
Quality time with you.
We could attach some strings.
And, take you where we go.
You’d never miss a ball game.
You’d never miss a show.
Of course, we’d change your name.
They’d no longer call you “Dad”.
How’s Pinnochio?
That doesn’t sound half bad.
Where are you when I need you, Ang?
Why can’t you be right there?
On the other end of the line
To ask “How do you dare?!
Ask my sister for anything
After all that you have done?
You SOB, you little worm, you worthless piece of scum!
And then today you have the nerve to call her up and ask
If she can help YOU with your cable bill?
It’s time you do some math!
You see, my little sister, she is working very hard.
Thanks to you and your lazy ass, there’s no money on her card.
She has not received child support in over two months now.
And, she’s trying desperately to pay her bills somehow.
What gives you the right to ask her for ANYTHING?
My sister owes you nothing now and forevermore.
You gave up that right when YOU walked out that door.
That’s right. You’re the one, the one that did the leaving.
So, move the hell on.
She’s done with your deceiving!”
I’ve got four little reasons that I don’t choose me.
Four little reasons that I’m as happy as can be.
Four little reasons that I run myself ragged.
Four little reasons that my finger nails are jagged.
Four little reasons that my house is in disarray.
Four little reasons that I have an excuse to play.
Nothing in this world compares to my four little reasons.
Barefoot in the front yard,
Just me and my guitar.
Mom wants to take my picture
So we can make a thank you card.
Gotta say thank you.
Thanks for my guitar.
Gonna make music.
Gonna be a star.
Barefoot in the front yard.
Just me and my guitar.
One of us is irrational.
While the other one is not.
One of us is full of rage.
While the other simply turns the page
One of us needs to change.
The other is changing every day.
One of us likes to bully.
While the other tries not to cower.
One of us needs to realize
He doesn’t have all the power.
Sorry if I’ve let you down.
But, sometimes I feel like I might drown.
In all that’s around me.
In all that’s not done.
So, I can’t even wake up to the morning sun.
My house is a mess.
I can not sleep.
Too many things on the floor to sweep.
Head hurts, bills suck.
I just want to scream the bad word that rhymes with “duck”!
But, I’m ok.
I enjoy watching you squirm.
Across from me like a wriggly worm.
Worried she might see you,
For what you really are,
Realizing she’s gone way too far.
Well, that won’t happen cause you’ll spin your lies.
That’s one of your traits she’ll come to despise.
You’ve gotta put a wedge between her and me.
Just like you did with your first ex and me.
You can’t risk us getting along.
No way, no how,
That would make for a great country song!
Without him, I’m a better me.
Without him, we’re a better “we”.
Without him, we laugh and play.
Without him, it’s a brighter day.
Without him, we go to church.
Without him, we no longer search
For peace and love in our own home.
It’s always there wherever we roam.
Without him, we found Him.
Without him the Light is no longer dim.
Without him, I’m a better me.
Without him, we’re a better “we”.
You’re nothing like MY Daddy.
You never will compare.
You look out for your best interests,
And you never really care,
What the rest of us are doing,
Or what any of us might need,
It’s all about what you want,
And you make sure that you get it,
You have your ways of convincing me,
To do things that are stupid,
And, somehow you think I should care about your circumstances,
You should get a refund and I should just get screwed,
Well, no matter how much I might owe,
This will be your one last screw,
So, I’ve decided to enjoy myself,
And stick it to you,
Not by being spiteful or by being a bitch,
But, by finally saying “this is a bunch of shit”,
It’s long overdue for you to have to pay,
By learning how to be a man and to stop using me,
My retirement’s depleted and now I owe even more,
Due to all the taxes and you trying to get me to pay even more,
By getting your little refund and thinking I would stand,
For you having the upper hand,
You sorry excuse for a man
You say I’m always black and white,
Never any shades of gray,
But, how is it that I’m the one that always says “ok”,
And, you end up with the benefit of me caving in,
Allowing you to pay less than you really owe,
Well, no more, not today,
Your gravy train is on the go.
So much hurt, so much debt,
So much pain and sorrow,
I think It’s only fair we both wake up tomorrow,
Knowing that I have a plan,
Still you beg, steal, and borrow,
You act as if I’m immune to feeling any pain,
And that you’re the only one that ever should complain,
About the fact that you owe half of all the debts incurred,
During the past eleven years,
Man, you really are a turd!
Thank you. Thank you very much.
I’ll be here all weekend.
Lizzi, oh Lizzi, You’re so sweet.
And you’ve got a beautiful smile.
You’re very artistic and very creative.
You’ve got your very own style.
You love giraffes.
And you love to do crafts.
But, sometimes you’re in denial.
You feel betrayed and you feel left out,
Not knowing all the while
How much you’re loved
And the fact that you are God’s very own child.
Carli, oh, Carli,
What can I say?
You make me laugh each and every day.
With the dorky faces you make
And silly pictures you take,
I sometimes can’t keep in the laughter.
You’re sarcastic and sassy
And sometimes you’re nasty.
But, some etiquette classes
Will soon make you classy.
I have a wonderful friend and neighbor
I’ve known for 16 years.
She’s been here for us the past six months
Through the emotions and the tears.
She shows up on our doorstep
With place mats and with dishes,
Groceries and goodies,
And all things delicious.
She and her family watch out for me
And my little cubs.
And, I don’t know what we’d do
Without the wonderful Grubbs.
Angie’s always been my favorite sister.
When she moved away, oh how I missed her.
Four years my senior, she showed me the way.
To be the caring, loving, person that I am today.
We slept together when we were little.
You know me, I have a heart that is brittle.
We scratched each other’s backs, but she always cheated.
My back never got all the scratching it needed.
I worried about things that were out of my control.
That’s what you do when you have a lonely soul.
As we got older, she took me to church.
And showed me how God could pull me out of that lurch.
She was there with me when we realized.
That by an alien I’d been compromised.
There was a beeping in my arm that wouldn’t go away.
Unless our brother Scott was in the room to stay.
Remember the morning we asked God for more sleep.
We went downstairs and didn’t hear a peep.
Dad came down to see what we were doing.
And we told him we were up because it was morning.
He quickly showed us it was the middle of the night.
And we ran back upstairs with quite a fright.
Why did our alarm say it was such.
How could its time have moved so much.
As it turned out the clock’s hands were moving really fast.
Due to a cord plugged in incorrectly in the room we just passed.
Dad gave us an explanation of how this had happened.
But we went back to bed knowing our prayer had been answered.
Now that my life has been turned upside down.
She and David are here to ensure I don’t drown.
She is the best sister there will ever be.
Please just don’t tell Kelly or Kiki.
Is crying in church and at lunch gonna change the amount of debt I owe?
Probably not, but I don’t care, I’m letting the tears flow.
I borrow from you, then borrow from them and try to pay it back,
But, how the hell can I keep up when bills continue to stack?
I know one day it will all be better,
But, right now I’m unsure,
How to get things back on track and how to make it work,
My credit score still really sucks even though bills paid on time,
Thanks to that special someone that is no longer mine.
If I don’t have the money this week, how the hell will I have it the next?
You can tell me what you want,
But I don’t have to listen.
You can tell me that you care,
But, I don’t have to believe.
I am here to tell you
That you broke my heart,
But, I can now say
We have a brand new start.
And, I no longer need to hear
You voice your concern,
So, talk to your girlfriend.
Talk to your ex-wife.
Talk to your boss.
And, have a nice life.
Leave.
Be gone.
Don’t call me anymore.
I love our life now
More than I ever did before.
No more never getting to be free.
No more of you lying to me.
No more of your drinking.
No more chains.
No more worrying
About all those emotional pains.
I’m here to tell you.
I don’t need you anymore.
I’m here to tell you
You can stay at the front door.
You’re no longer welcome here,
You made that decision.
The day you said you were leaving in July 2011.
You can lie to me.
You can lie to our sons and daughters.
You can lie to your ex-wife.
And, you can lie to your girlfriend.
But, believe me, in the end,
Your lies will come to haunt you.
I know the truth and so do our children.
I don’t have to lie.
Your own actions and your own words
Showed them by and by
Who you were and who you are
And how you always try
To make things look like you’re the best,
And how you made their Mommy cry.
I don’t have to lie.
I don’t have to lie.
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